Nobody is immune to the dating scam known as catfishing. Here are seven signs to watch out for.
What Is Catfishing? 7 Signs to Watch Out For
Updated on Apr. 01, 2025
Love has a tendency to give the world a rosy glow, which is part of the reason so many people find themselves blindsided by a romance scam known as catfishing. But what is catfishing, exactly, and why do people do it? At its simplest, the scam involves creating a fake online identity to garner romantic attention. To make their fake profiles, catfishers typically lift photos and personal details from the internet. They tend to target multiple people simultaneously, sometimes love bombing 10 or more potential victims at a time.
“The top 10 dating apps are downloaded over 20 million times each month,” explains Monica Eaton, CEO of Chargebacks911, a cybersecurity company that’s successfully protected over 15 billion online transactions. “New accounts are always popping up [on the apps], and when you combine super-high traffic with super-high turnover, it’s a target-rich environment for fraudsters.”
Between loneliness, artificial intelligence (AI) and other factors, the world is ripe for online scams. According to the FBI’s Internet Crime Report, individuals lost a total of $652,544,805 to romance scams in 2023. The Better Business Bureau suggests that number could be much higher; after all, people aren’t embarrassed to say their credit card was stolen, but many are ashamed to admit they were duped in love. Keep reading to learn more about catfishing and seven signs to watch out for.
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What is catfishing?
Online dating has made meeting new people more accessible, but it’s also given fraudsters the perfect opportunity to scam hopeless romantics by using phony online identities. If you’ve been catfished, it means you’ve been hooked by a romantic partner who isn’t the person they claim to be. “It’s no surprise that catfishing is a common occurrence on dating apps. Dating apps have become a big pond for catfish to swim in, and scammers are reeling it in big,” says Charlie Moore, chief consumer digital safety adviser at identity theft prevention company Aura.
Think this could never happen to you? Think again. If you’re looking for love online, you’re at risk. “One thing all catfishing victims have in common is that ‘they all believe in true love, and they believe they’ve found it,'” says Lisa Schiller, director of investigations and communications for the Better Business Bureau of Wisconsin. “Con artists create compelling backstories and trick you into falling for someone who doesn’t exist,” Schiller says. “If you’re online dating, you need to be aware of all the nuances of catfishing and not be caught asking yourself ‘What is catfishing?’ when you’re already hooked on someone’s line.”
One thing you might notice is that it’s specifically an online dating scam. It exists on dating sites such as Tinder and Hinge, on social media sites such as Instagram and Facebook, and on messaging platforms such as WhatsApp and Telegram. It can even happen on LinkedIn. While it’s less likely that someone will catfish you through your phone number or email, it’s not out of the question. If you’ve ever received a text from an unknown number that said something like, “What are you doing tonight?” someone might have been trying to scam you through a text, otherwise known as smishing.
Why is it called catfishing?
The name of this romance scam refers both to the literal action of catfishing—hooking unsuspecting catfish in the water—and to Nev Schulman’s 2010 documentary, Catfish. But you may be more familiar with the MTV series that ran for eight seasons and was based on the film.
Both the film and the series document the truths and lies of online dating. In the documentary, Vince, one of the characters, explains that when cod was transported from Alaska to China, the meat often became mushy and tasteless by the time it reached its destination. The fishermen eventually realized that if they put catfish in the tanks, the catfish would chase the cod for the entire journey. This would keep the cod active and agile—and their meat fresher. “And there are those people who are catfish in life,” Vince continues. “And they keep you on your toes. They keep you guessing.”
Why do people catfish?
People almost always catfish to try to get someone’s money. It can also be a means of entertainment, or a way for people with insecurities to “date” without revealing their true selves. “Sometimes a catfisher is simply a lonely person hiding behind a fake persona,” explains Schiller. “But often it’s the first step in a phishing scheme to steal personal information or a romance scam to trick you out of money.” Below, we look at the reasons people catfish.
Insecurity
Not all catfishing arises from malicious intent. Sometimes the catfisher isn’t trying to scam the victim out of money and is truly hoping for a romantic partner. But because of insecurities, they think the only way to achieve that is through faking a profile.
“The scams that are the most successful are the ones that we want to believe are true,” says Eaton, adding that this hope exists on both ends of the dating app.
Entertainment
Some people engage in catfishing purely for entertainment. Donna Andersen, the founder of LoveFraud.com and author of Red Flags of Love Fraud, has talked to many women with romance scammer stories—and tales of catfishing in particular. “These women resisted and resisted, and the catfishers kept pursuing and pursuing,” she says. “Still, they never met in person. Finally, the women succumbed and agreed to the relationship. The catfishers promptly disappeared.”
For the catfishers, it was all a game. They wanted to see if they could make the women fall in love with them. When the women did fall in love, the game was over. The catfishers won, sometimes leaving the women with broken hearts. People who catfish for entertainment most likely suffer from a mental illness, such as antisocial, narcissistic or psychopathic personality disorders.
Bullying
Some people catfish so they can harass or cyberbully someone while remaining anonymous, which is one of the more problematic issues with catfishing. Sometimes catfishers create fake profiles to harass people simply because they have different political or religious viewpoints.
“People create a fake profile, start chatting with their victim, gain their trust, find out personal details about them and then use this information to bully them,” Markuson says. This cyberbullying could also lead to doxxing.
Blackmail
Sometimes a scammer will convince a victim to send compromising photos or videos with the premeditated intention of threatening to release the images to their digital contacts unless the victim pays them.
“The best way to avoid this scam, of course, is to avoid sending compromising photos or videos of yourself in the first place,” Eaton says. “And if you do send something, please be smart and avoid including your face, identifying marks or tattoos, or anything else that might disclose your identity.”
Spying
Sometimes people catfish because they want to stalk or spy on someone they know. This often occurs when one partner is trying to catch the other cheating and creates a fake profiles to ‘test’ them. Some people use catfishing to get to know a person they’ve seen in real life but are too afraid to talk to.
Experimenting with sexual preferences
Although it can hurt the people who fall in love with a catfisher’s fabricated persona, it’s not inherently malicious when someone catfishes to try on a new sexual identity or sexual preferences. In this case, the catfisher isn’t trying to deceive, manipulate or win trust through a false identity so much as they’re experimenting with a new identity without fear of judgment or exposure.
Financial gain
Some people catfish with the sole intention of getting money out of their victims. “They prey on vulnerable people and suck them in to bleed them dry,” says Susan Trombetti, a matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking. “Online dating is ripe with fake profiles, and this is the biggest venue for financial scammers.”
Widows, widowers and lonely singles tend to fall for this. “A catfisher will say they have medical bills or cannot finance their traveling to meet the victim,” says Barbara Santini, a psychologist and sex and relationship adviser. “They hope the victim will send them money for fictitious bills or for a plane ticket they’ll never purchase.”
Signs of catfishing
By now, you should know the answer to “What is catfishing?” Equally important, however, is knowing how to spot and avoid catfishing. The seven signs below suggest your online romance may be less than legit.
1. Nonstop chatting
Catfishers want to quickly figure out if they’re building trust or if the victim is on to them, so they love bomb all day and night. “More often than not, catfishers will contact their victims at odd hours of the day,” says Rori Sassoon, a relationship expert and author of The Art of the Date. “They may use the excuse of being in a different time zone.”
2. Inappropriate requests
A potential love interest won’t generally request explicit photos at first, but a catfisher might constantly make this request because they’re looking for a way to blackmail you. “The explicit content and other sensitive information make it easy for them to steal from you,” Santini says.
3. Intentionally vague communication
Some people don’t engage with social media, and on its own, that’s not alarming. “But something shady is going on if they refuse to tell you their last name or have a nonexistent social media presence,” Sassoon says. “And that’s the last thing you want to be involved in.”
Catfishers will never reveal details that you can prove—that’s one of the prime ways to identify a scammer. They keep their responses generic and are intentionally vague so you can’t detect outright lies. They’ll tell you they live “outside of Boston” but won’t give you an exact town, or they might tell you the city where they (supposedly) went to college but not the name of the school.
“You can’t track them to an address or a desk at their office or their job,” Trombetti says. “Maybe their name is a very common one, so it’s hard to Google them and find out if they’re really who they say they are.”
4. Awkward or unrealistic photos
If your new beau is sharing photos of his dog but something about the pictures seems off, trust your gut. A photo stolen off the web might be blurry or cropped oddly. “Scammers are after low-hanging fruit,” Eaton says. “So they usually don’t take the time to edit and Photoshop the images expertly. They’re trying to do the least amount of work possible.”
Unrealistic photos are another catfish profile sign. “Most of the people you meet on social media sites aren’t going to look like supermodels,” she says. “Their bodies won’t be shredded, ripped and perfectly tanned, with all their pictures looking like they were taken on location by a professional film crew. I mean, it’s possible that a Victoria’s Secret supermodel is lonely and desperate to meet you, but it’s probably not the most high-probability outcome.”
It’s worth noting that some scammers also use software driven by artificial intelligence to create personalized images of people who don’t exist, so you won’t be able to find their photos on the web and see that they belong to someone else. Over the past few years, catfishers have become more skilled at using AI to help them craft their dating profiles.
5. The person is too good to be true
When it comes to online dating, anyone who seems too good to be true generally is. Scammers have mastered the art of scouring accounts for details, which means your so-called girlfriend will likely share many of your interests. “They pretend to want the same things out of a relationship that you do because they are trying to gain your trust so that they can rob you of your money,” Trombetti says.
6. Text-only communication
If you’ve been texting with a new “online friend” for a few weeks, you’ll get to the point where it makes sense to hear each other’s voices and have an actual conversation. If they only want to text, that’s a red flag, and you should keep an eye out for warning signs in your text conversations with them.
“There are chatbots that initiate and mimic text conversations, but you should be able to tell that their responses aren’t on the level,” Eaton says. “Usually, they’re clumsy at redirecting the conversation, understanding references and answering personal questions. They’re great at asking questions—but not nearly as proficient at answering them.”
7. The person redirects you elsewhere
Let’s say you receive a message from a would-be romantic partner, who then asks you to visit an OnlyFans account. Could it be legit? Maybe. There are two possible reasons someone might message you but direct you to an OnlyFans account: They might be on OnlyFans and want you as a member of their fan base. Or they stole photos from someone and are catfishing you.
“It’s possible that the OnlyFans star is romantically interested in you, and it’s also possible that your ‘personal’ message was mass-blasted to thousands of people,” Eaton says. “And it’s further possible that their OnlyFans URL is a phishing attempt to take you to a bogus website and steal your financial data.”
Bottom line: Don’t click on links in messages.
What to do if you suspect catfishing
So your one true love might be a con artist, but at least you realized something suspicious was going on. As soon as you suspect foul play, take the steps below.
- Don’t send money. Whatever you do, don’t fall for excuses or emotional pleas for help.
- Don’t click on any links the person sends—it’s most likely a phishing attempt. If you did click a link, change your passwords.
- Stop communicating with the person immediately. Trust your gut.
- Block this person and don’t explain yourself. Just go.
- Report the person’s profile to the dating app or social media site where you met.
- If your financial information is compromised, notify your bank and credit card companies immediately.
- Report the scam to local law enforcement and, if you’re down six figures or more, report it to the FBI.
“Catfishing is only going to increase, which is why it’s important that consumers protect their private and financial information with services such as identity theft protection,” Moore says. “You never know when you could find yourself involved with a scammer. You might think you found the one, when in reality, all you have found is a scammer and lost money.”
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Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of articles on personal technology, arming readers with the knowledge to protect themselves against cybersecurity threats and internet scams as well as revealing the best tips, tricks and shortcuts for computers, cellphones, apps, texting, social media and more. For this piece on catfishing, Jaime Stathis tapped her experience as a journalist who has written dozens of articles about scams and digital security for Reader’s Digest to ensure that all information is accurate and offers the best possible advice to readers. We rely on credentialed experts with personal experience and know-how as well as primary sources including tech companies, professional organizations and academic institutions. We verify all facts and data and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Sources:
- Monica Eaton, CEO of Chargebacks911; interview September 2022 and March 2025
- Charlie Moore, chief consumer digital safety adviser at identity theft prevention company Aura; interview March 2025
- Lisa Schiller, director of investigations and communications for the Better Business Bureau of Wisconsin; interview September 2022
- Donna Andersen, founder of LoveFraud.com and author of Red Flags of Love Fraud; interview September 2022
- Susan Trombetti, matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking; interview September 2022
- Barbara Santini, psychologist and sex adviser at Peaches and Screams; interview September 2022
- Rori Sassoon, relationship expert, author of The Art of the Date; interview September 2022
- FBI: “Federal Bureau of Investigation Internet Crime Report 2023”
- Better Business Bureau: “Online Romance Scams”
